Saturday, September 15, 2007

ROUGH draft

Here is my first rough draft for project #1. I think rough is an understatement. I think I need to work on my consistency and organization a bit.

“Sleeping with the Fishes”

Imagine exploring the murky ocean floor by piloting your own deep sea submersible. After parallel parking next a shark and disembarking your vehicle, you decide to unwind by soaking in a transparent jacuzzi tub that reveals a sleek sting ray gliding beneath you. You tilt your head back and gaze up at the domed ceiling that looks out into cerulean water packed to the gills with vibrantly hued sea creatures swimming around you.

No, this isn’t a dream. This could be your next vacation.

Underwater hotels have been around for decades, but recently they have been experiencing many technological advancements, making them a possible stepping stone to future space vacations. The first underwater hotel, the Jules’ Undersea Lodge, located in Key Largo, Florida, is a far cry from the luxury hotels being built some 60 feet below the surface today.

The Jules’ Undersea Lodge is a former underwater research habitat that has been converted into a hotel that anyone can visit. It is a cramped space complete with minimal amenities, including a microwave, refrigerator, stereo and vcr/dvd player. Guests gain access to the lodge by scuba diving 21 feet below the surface and entering through a hole in the bottom of the structure. In comparison, the new large scale, luxury hotels being constructed in Dubai and Fiji offer a wide array of adventures and experiences.

Guests might be concerned about their safety since the structures will be constructed with acrylic and glass, among other materials, but the building plans are required to fulfill rigid safety requirements. Each room is isolated from every other room with a double pressure proof door system, as well as emergency life support systems.

Along with the improvements in safety, the new underwater hotels will also offer a lot more attractions over the Jules’. The Hydropolis in Dubai will feature a theater, museum, shopping mall, and even a cosmetic surgery clinic. The Poseidon in Fiji will have similar to offer, as well as a library, tennis courts and a revolving restaurant. Both hotels will feature a spa and gym.

For the first time ever, people who don’t swim or are inexperienced in scuba diving are able to experience the underwater world. The Hydropolis is being constructed so that guests are greeted at a land station and then board a train that travels through a tunnel and deposits them at the hotel 61 feet below the surface.

The advancements being made in underwater hotels make it possible to inspire awareness of the sea, by highlighting the problems and potential within underwater living. Joachim Hauser, architect for Hydropolis, claims, “Humans could actually live self-sufficiently underwater, generating energy, nurturing food supplies and so on.” Hydropolis and Poseidon will also generate awareness with their museums that will educate guests about underwater life while observing it simultaneously.

Starting in 2009, you will be able to improve your golf game while a school of fish swims around you. You can interact with the creatures outside your suite by feeding them with the press of a button. And when you sink into your featherbed at night, you will be sleeping with the fishes.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

One thing that I noticed is that you jump around from the Jules' Undersea Lodge and the luxury hotels in Dubai and Fiji. Try fleshing out the accomodations of one facility before moving on to the next.

It also seems that you are promoting Dubai and Fiji over the Jules' Lodge. If you endorse all three, that would allow you to offer different underwater experiences.

These a just a couple suggestions that could help with your document structure.

m4rk said...

Wow, great topic choice. Pretty amazing technologies ...

I like the way you play on a traditionally negative phrase to recreate it as a positive experience.

I agree with Oakley's impressions--there are a lot of quick jumps from resort to resort. It's a little disarming.

I found a couple of typos, too, which are petty grievances, but might help refine your final product.

In paragraph one you say "...next a shark...." You've omitted "to."

In paragraph six, there's a sentence which reads, "...have similar to offer...." Something got dropped there.

Also, in the first sentence of the second to last paragraph, you might consider changing "...within..." to "of." Something to streamline it, at least.

Anyway, great piece. Hope my suggestions aren't too late to be of use.